Should you ever have to "deal" with bad behavior?

WOW! first of all, im sorry that you are having to go through all of this. after reading your post, i can actually relate to several of the things you brought up. in my opinion, you should never have to "deal" with something like that just because the person exhibiting that kind of behavior is a family member. that does not give them the right to be abusive whether it's emotional or physical. it sounds like your father has a lot of issues that he has never dealt with and isn't happy with himself and his life. and as a result, he's unfortunately treating you and your mother like crap. and you clearly are aware of it and do not want to stand for it. nor should you. have you ever tried to have a calm and civil conversation with your dad, telling him how you feel about everything? he doesnt sound like he's the easiest person to talk to but that may at least be a start to making things better. and if there really is no chance of being better, than at least maybe you can feel ok about how YOU are handling things for you and your life. if you think about it....life is extremely short and your happiness is truly important. if you are not happy or at least not happy where you are living, and there is no getting through to your dad, you should leave. for your own good and happiness. but not on a bad note and not before at least trying to work things out. but regarless of who a person is to you, you should never just have to put up with their inappropriate behavior. because that is a cop out. that would just mean that everyone could walk around acting however they want and just tell everyone around them to deal with them being an asshole. and thats just ridiculous. i hope this helps and i truly hope things get better with your dad.